PIMP MY RIDE
Using 
the common parlance of today, I am herby requesting that my compadres, both in and out of the business, provide me with some promotional assistance. Most break-throughs in Hollywood happen because of an obscure phsyical law first articulated, I believe, by Newton: "Discovery happens not through diligence; but becasue of who you know."
In honor of that great scientific advance, I am herby inviting you to help by acting in my stead as a Cbyer-Pimp. Consider it an e-vite, only there's no annoying advert for Skyy Vodka; nor, thankfully, do you have to come up with a creative lie about why you can't get on the subway (or freeway) and go to that party where you don't want to bump into your ex. You simply have to either click on forward when I send you updates to Hollywood Chills, or use the little envelope button when you actually read the blog. Send it to all your friends (that won't hate you for receiving forwards). Tell them it's a killer blog and remind them, "Hey, it's not a chain letter." They won't have to send it to ten friends, won't have to say ten Hail Mary's, and won't be visited upon by a plauge of loucsts if they don't read it. A third option is to lend me your homie's e-mails (with their permission, of course) and I'll do the pimping myself.
Imagine
the pride you'll feel wearing this hat, and knowing that you're a part of a phenomeon. Not enough? Okay, I'm also putting together thank you packages, sort of like the ones they give celebrities waiting in the green rooms of David Letterman and The View. Only my thank you gifts will have to be (at least at first) comprised of things lying around the house. So, I've assembled lovely origami cardboard boxes, molded into the shape of J-Lo's butt. So far I've filled them each with a box of Marlboro Lights, pre-owned CD's of either ABBA or Kajagoogoo, and a plethora of condoms. Oh, and if you act now, I'll even throw in a signed copy of my old headshot, too.
"My bling is your bling," as they say here in Los Angeles. So I'll always return the favor. Thanks much, you guys.
the common parlance of today, I am herby requesting that my compadres, both in and out of the business, provide me with some promotional assistance. Most break-throughs in Hollywood happen because of an obscure phsyical law first articulated, I believe, by Newton: "Discovery happens not through diligence; but becasue of who you know."In honor of that great scientific advance, I am herby inviting you to help by acting in my stead as a Cbyer-Pimp. Consider it an e-vite, only there's no annoying advert for Skyy Vodka; nor, thankfully, do you have to come up with a creative lie about why you can't get on the subway (or freeway) and go to that party where you don't want to bump into your ex. You simply have to either click on forward when I send you updates to Hollywood Chills, or use the little envelope button when you actually read the blog. Send it to all your friends (that won't hate you for receiving forwards). Tell them it's a killer blog and remind them, "Hey, it's not a chain letter." They won't have to send it to ten friends, won't have to say ten Hail Mary's, and won't be visited upon by a plauge of loucsts if they don't read it. A third option is to lend me your homie's e-mails (with their permission, of course) and I'll do the pimping myself.
Imagine
the pride you'll feel wearing this hat, and knowing that you're a part of a phenomeon. Not enough? Okay, I'm also putting together thank you packages, sort of like the ones they give celebrities waiting in the green rooms of David Letterman and The View. Only my thank you gifts will have to be (at least at first) comprised of things lying around the house. So, I've assembled lovely origami cardboard boxes, molded into the shape of J-Lo's butt. So far I've filled them each with a box of Marlboro Lights, pre-owned CD's of either ABBA or Kajagoogoo, and a plethora of condoms. Oh, and if you act now, I'll even throw in a signed copy of my old headshot, too.
"My bling is your bling," as they say here in Los Angeles. So I'll always return the favor. Thanks much, you guys.
posted by RLB @ 12:19 PM
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